“Should we have another baby?”
Over the years, I’ve had a lot of conversations with other women about family size. It’s a decision that is supposed to be easy to make in our culture, but usually it’s not. When my friends share their hearts about this topic, I so appreciate their transparency and boy can I identify.
I grew up in a large family and loved it. I have always wanted a large family. And now I have one. No regrets.
I know some Christians don’t struggle with the idea of family size at all. They view it as a decision for them to make, they make it, and they don’t think twice about it.
Then there are those on the other end of the spectrum, like the Duggar family, who don’t believe in limiting family size at all.
I believe the Biblical view falls somewhere in the middle.
I believe what God says when He tells us that children are an unqualified blessing.
Any child conceived is an eternal soul, made in the image of God. I think we forget this sometimes in our cavalier attitude toward not having them.
I don’t believe that it’s ever a mistake to have another child. Children are not a mistake. They are precious to God and should be to us also.
I realize that, according to Jeremiah, God knows our children BEFORE they are conceived. I have always had a great fear (respectful fear, not terror) of not having a child God has planned for me.
Our desire should be to have God’s heart toward children—He views them as a blessing, a reward, a gift, He loves them and He calls children to come to Him.
The Bible doesn’t address the issue of birth control at all. And yes, it existed in Bible times, albeit not in the sophisticated forms we have today. Scriptures used by “quiverfull” advocates are twisted and pulled out of context, proof-texts turned around to support their view. God does not forbid limiting family size.
I respect the decision of any couple to have as many children as they desire, including the decision to forego all ways to limit or space children. I believe that if God leads a family in this way, He will also provide for them sufficiently.
I believe that if a couple chooses to limit their family size, they should choose a way of doing so that does not threaten the life of a child they might inadvertently conceive. Some common methods of birth control are potentially abortifacent.
I know that a lot of people claim that they can’t afford more children when in reality they don’t want to do without luxuries.
I have talked to many, many older people who wish they had had more children.
I have never talked to a parent of many who regrets any of the children they have.
I believe that most people pray more about whether to get married, change jobs, move, or buy a new puppy than about whether to conceive another child, another eternal soul made in God’s image.
But there’s a caveat.
Look for my eBook, Fearless Mothering, this fall!
*For those who have linkies in which I participated this morning…I am having difficulty linking back. Please be patient, I do want to link to you!*