The Need for Silence? Friday, Jun 12 2009 

Culture and Protecting our Children Stephanie 6:10 pm

children window

Growing up, my dad had a very low tolerance for noise, especially recorded noise.  Although we were never allowed to play our music loudly, nine times out of ten he either had us turn it off or down–way down–when he was home.  My mom never allowed us to become dependent on having music to work by.  “I don’t want you to think you can’t work unless you are listening to music,” she said.  I remember how irritated I used to get!  Now I know that they gave us a great gift.  Times of quiet bring mental and emotional rest.  And no, I don’t always have to have music to work by (although it’s nice sometimes).  I have to admit that I’m even turning into my dad in some ways, as media noise grates on my nerves when it goes on for too long.

Yesterday, Al Mohler posted a great blog article on children and the need for silence. In our noise-polluted society we sometimes forget that we (and our children) need times of quiet.  Today it takes a conscious effort to find silence, because noise is the world’s default setting.  But it’s worth it!

 

Modesty Monday, Nov 10 2008 

Books and Culture and Daughters and Links and Protecting our Children and Sensitive Topics Stephanie 6:37 pm

woman-red-vogue

I’ve wanted to talk about a few issues pertaining to daughters, but for now the thoughts haven’t gelled in my head enough to commit them to the keyboard. In the meantime, my friend, fashion blogger Rebecca, linked to this excellent Washington Post article about girls and dress.

In the past I also enjoyed Wendy Shalit’s book A Return to Modesty. It’s not a Christian book–Shalit is Jewish. I found her thoughts extremely insightful.

On one hand, I think it’s amazing that these issues even have to be addressed. (I’ve been told I’m a little naive.) On the other, I think it’s important to recognize that the way we adorn ourselves outwardly is merely a reflection of what’s really important–the heart. There’s a fine line between giving our daughters guidance about their outward appearance, while maintaining a focus on inner purity. A wholesome heart will naturally be reflected in wholesome attire, I think.

 

10 Ways to Help Your Kids During Times of Stress Sunday, Aug 31 2008 

Discipling Our Children and Protecting our Children and Things I'm Learning Stephanie 9:55 pm

Speaking to myself as much as anyone here, dear moms.  I pray that all of you Gulf Coast ladies are safely away with your families.

1. Model trust in God. When our children see that we are not afraid because we believe with all our hearts that God is in control, they will be more at peace. It will help their faith grow.

2. Give them spiritual encouragement. Read and memorize scripture together. Psalm 23 and Psalm 91 are great places to start. Pray for and with them.

3. Keep a peaceful atmosphere. Play calming music and minimize chaos and excessive noise.

4. Don’t take your stress out on them. It’s easy to become testy or withdrawn when we feel tense or concerned. Our kids need us to be even-tempered and approachable during times of stress more than ever.

5. Spend time together. Talk, read aloud, play games, go for a walk. This helps our kids feel secure.

6. Reassure. Encourage your children with your words, but also give lots and lots of hugs.

7. Establish some sort of routine. As a crisis drags out, it’s comforting to have a routine and a general plan for each day, as much as possible.

8. Feed them healthfully. Make sure they get a balanced diet, not too many weird or new foods, and not too much sugar. Keep them hydrated with plenty of water.

9. Make sure they get adequate rest. Not only do they need a usual amount of sleep, they may need an extra nap or early bedtime. Stress is exhausting.

10. Turn off the TV! In times of natural disaster, viewing destruction will only make your children feel powerless and afraid, especially if they know it’s where their homes, friends and family are. They don’t have the emotional filters we adults have, and it’s detrimental to allow devastating images to play in front of them over and over.

 

Girlie Stuff Tuesday, Aug 19 2008 

Creativity and Daughters and Protecting our Children and Simple Craft Stephanie 11:17 pm

Well, this will not have any great recommendations like my post about boys, just a couple fluffy ones for girls. I’ve been making these simple headbands for my girls. (Don’t look too closely, there are some loose threads and other imperfections, not to mention that the picture’s dark.) You can download the free pattern here, and it’s simple if you have even rudimentary sewing skills. And actually much cuter than my picture.

Totally unrelated, Elizabeth saved all last summer for and American Girl doll and has really enjoyed their web site. I am super-duper-very-much NOT a fan of computer games for kids and rarely allow mine access to the internet, but I will even let her play the American Girl games every now and then for a treat. They are exceptionally wholesome and play pleasant music, which is a huge plus for me. The only slightly objectionable thing I’ve found on their web site is the occasional mention of green this and green that, which I simply steer to a conversation about stewarding well what God has blessed us with (including creation), rather than radically saving the earth by human effort. But that’s just me.

Anyway, if you have a little girl and need a safe place for her to go online, I highly recommend the American Girl site.

A side note: If you allow your children on the internet at all, make sure you keep the computer in a common area of the house and I can’t emphasize enough how important it is to use a filter!!!

 

Protecting Our Children Tuesday, Jul 22 2008 

Protecting our Children and Sensitive Topics Stephanie 11:44 pm

I like to talk about the happy part of mothering, not the scary, dangerous part. But sometimes it’s necessary to talk about the bad stuff, so here’s something Billy and I have used that might be helpful to some of you. Family Watchdog is the National S*x Offender Registry (word altered to prevent yucky googlers). You can easily search your area–even your street–for convicted offenders. We once decided not to buy a home in a particular neighborhood simply because an offender lived too close to the house we were looking at. I like their motto: “Awareness is your best defense.” There’s truth in that. It’s important to know who’s near you who could be a danger to your children. In a broken world, there are no guarantees that our children won’t get hurt, no matter how closely we watch–but it’s important for us as parents to be as wise and careful as possible.